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Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

Okay girls, let’s talk about guarding our hearts. Before I lose you, hear me out on this. I, of all people, need to hear this and I hope it will be just as useful to you. I think we go through relationships thinking, that we are guarding our hearts, when we really have no idea how to. We don’t see the difference between telling ourselves we need to guard our hearts and actually guarding ourselves. If you are anything like me, you are not even sure of how long you are to guard your heart and to whom you are to guard it against. This blog post will not give you all of the answers, shooot, it might not help you at all; but it certainly gave me some thoughts to pray through. I only hope it does the same for you whether you are a female, male or a unicorn.

1. Not a 4.0 so far?

I hate to be the one to break it to you. But we have this heart to guard and we cannot get out of it. We are told it’s the very center of us. (Psalm 4:23) But how do we possibly guard it against the breeze we desperately open the window for? If you struggle with this the same way I do, you feel as though you are being graded with an “F” in guarding your heart these days. Whether you are single or in a relationship, you have to do it. You think (or rather convince yourself) no guy will ever be captivated by me and as soon as one nearly grins at you, you prepare a four course meal with the night’s special a-la-heart. How can we possibly help ourselves from giving our hearts so freely when we don’t even notice we are? I mean, we are girls (no offense).

2. All that advice you are given-What is a girl to do?

Between the, “Guard you heart, let him chase you, control your emotions, be patient, and he should pursue you” isms, you don’t even know what to do anymore. Between the silly advice your friend’s give, the little tid bits of wisdom you receive from ghosts of courtships past, and the will of God, you have a lot to decipher. We place so much emphasis on what others tell us. As soon as something big happens, we tell someone! I know for me, as soon as something comes up I run to text a friend about it, rather than praying. What’s so wrong about that? I don’t even give myself time to guard my heart and unfortunately, our friends are not always so helpful in that! The most important advice I have for you, pray! Even when you don’t feel like it, even when you don’t want to. Submit to God’s will. Place his desires above your own. Easier said than done, I know!

3. Finally, how do you really guard your heart?

To be entirely honest, I don’t want to guard my heart. I want to give it away. That is what I was made for. But I have it backwards, I was never meant to give my heart away to man (nor woman). I was created to give my heart to God. Wholly and always to Him. So if you feel the same way, how do you guard your heart when you want to, but have no desire to at the same time. You guard it with scripture. Do you spend more time thinking about the man of your dreams, or the man in your life, than you do thinking about the one who loved you first? Afterall, it says in Deuteronomy to love the Lord your God with all your heart. (Deuteronomy 6:5) It doesn’t say with a fourth of your heart or half heartedly.

I was in a Bible study a few weeks ago and we were talking about spiritual warfare. The verse Psalm 4:23 came up in our workbook which says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” I was struggling particularly that day, with guarding my heart and understanding how to guard it. Then it all suddenly made sense. Here we were talking about knowing scripture to stand against the enemy, when I realized scripture can be used for so much more. I have always loved the verse where the Psalmist says, “I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” (Psalm 119:11) When we know God’s word, do we not come to know God better? His heart for us has been written down and so often we don’t take the time to read it, me included! When I find myself so eagerly ready to give away my heart, I begin to remind myself of verses that I committed to memorization. When I do this, suddenly my mind is no longer on the things of this world, but focused on God.

He’s Always Enough,
Liberty

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Pretty is. Beauty does. I heard this on a commercial recently and began to think about this. I mean, what could it possibly mean? Every girl wants to be pretty. We want to feel pretty and be told we are. But what about this thing called beauty? What could that be about? I hate to break it to some of you, but its not just about a girl who loves to read and ends up in a mansion with a harry beast, its much, much more! Lucky for us, we are to be called beauty too.

Recently, I was having lunch with some friends and we were talking about relationships. I confessed that I struggled with my definition of beauty. I feel as though I don’t have anything to bring to the table of marriage. I mean, what will I be able to offer my husband one day? I can’t really cook, neither do I care to honestly. I’m not very intellectual. I can’t talk on various subjects and don’t have profound knowledge on very much. I don’t always please everyone. I don’t always wear the right thing or show up at the right time. I certainly never say the right thing or respond the right way. So what could possibly be beautiful about me? Seriously. As my confession came to a close, I expressed what I am passionate about; however cliche it may be. Its the truth. I love people. I love holding orphans in Africa. I love loving people. I love caring for and helping people. I love being there for people. I love my family. There is nothing I love more than holding babies, any babies! But that’s all I have going for me and that’s my heart. My friends began to laugh as they looked at me puzzled. They obviously knew something I didn’t.

You see, I was looking at my strength as a weakness. I was forgetting the fact that I have loved. This then reminded us of what 1 Corinthians 13 says: “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains but have not love, I am nothing. If I gave away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

I realized the Bible says something quite differently about the beauty I possess. My friends also helped me realize that the very essence of my beauty is incredible. In fact, these verses greatly encourage what my heart longs for. The beauty the world asks of me is meaningless, its beauty that chases after the wind. What I gained from all of this? Who gives a rats rear that I can’t tell time backwards, recite the constitution or make French cuisine. According to Corinthians, if I have not loved, I am nothing. As a matter of fact, I’m not content with being nothing. I would rather love while I can. And that my dear reader, is my beauty. So whether my hair looks a hot mess tomorrow, my clothes don’t match or I don’t end up eating that great of a breakfast due to my lack of skill; I know that beauty is defined differently for each of us, because its defined by beauty itself.

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If you care about a girl in a special way, tell her! Because one day she might not be there to listen. Neither of you will live forever. She might move across the country, find another passion to occupy her mind or give up on you.

Life is too short not to tell the truth to someone you deeply care about. She doesn’t have to be the center of your world. She’s not suppose to be. Just let her know she’s a part of it. Don’t waste time. She’d be crazy to not want to know how you feel. Man up.

Tell her if you aren’t ready and if she has any sense, she’ll wait till you both are. She should know you aren’t her Salvation. Feel free to tell her in a big way with a banner across the sky or a small way like whispering it in her ear..

And just maybe, Lord willing, something beautiful will come from you opening your heart and pursuing her. I dare you.

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I want a Job 29 man. Why? Let me tell you something. But first, go read Job 29 when you get the chance.

Now, why do I want to spend the rest of my life with a Job 29 man. Because he is admirable. He is proactive, not lazy or ill-mannered. He is responsible. He’s respected by all. Nothing but kind words come from his mouth. People call him blessed. He reaches his arms far and wide to those who need to be loved. He serves as eyes to the blind and feet to the lame. His heart has wholly been stolen by Christ. He is friendly to strangers and pursues relationships. He is strong in stature and in faith. Wisdom walks with him and others know this. He lives for nothing but to bring glory to God. He encourages others and sees the need for encouragement when one has no hope left. Children look up to him and he brings laughter to their hearts. He longs for God’s presence. He has faith that God holds all things in his hands. He desires his heart to be changed through God’s word. He is genuine with God and with people. He is honored, even by those older than he is. He denies himself so that Christ may become greater in his life. He turns the other cheek. If someone robs him of his shoes, he offers his shirt as well. He delights in the worship of his creator and worships as if he’s been waiting his whole life for such a moment. He is not prideful. He does not judge others. He is aware of his need for a Savior. He’s looking for a Proverbs 31 woman. He cares about my heart and the beauty that encompasses it. He is patiently waiting for what the Lord wants to give him. He believes in true love. He is a hard worker. He knows that nothing can be done in his own strength. He lives everyday walking in humility and by faith. I want him to love God more than he loves me. I want this man because I know he will lead me, love me, serve me, cherish me and honor me. I want this man because his biggest passion is to love the Lord with all his heart.

So there you go. That is the kind of man I am looking for. That is the kind of man God hopes for me. That is the kind of man I will wait for, and I will not settle for anything less. Now, are my standards too high? I don’t think so, after all, I have to live in such a way to honor this man. So with that being said, his standards should be just as high for me. Hope this inspires you.

Salutations,

Liberty Stripped of her Pride

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I’m struggling to even find words to describe events that have taken place in the last few weeks. God continues to overwhelm me with his grace everyday. Most days I stand in awe, speechless of the love He shows me. Let me explain. I’ll try to make it short, I promise. So God put a burden on my heart to start a group for girls to be real with each other. A place where girl’s who were not Christians, could come and hear sound advice from other girls living their lives by faith. I desired for girls to see that we don’t need gossip, cliques, makeup or even boys to define us. We are worth so much more than that. We know our worth thanks to Jesus and we don’t have to allow anyone else to tell us who we are. We need Sisterhood. So we have had two meetings so far and they have both been amazing. At the last one we watched the movie Courageous. If you have not seen it, please do, it may just change your life. The meeting was chocolate themed because girls and chocolate go perfect together, duhhh! I invited a ton of girls, some of which I had not spoken with in months. A friend of mine that I had a class with over a year ago got my text and expressed that Sisterhood was exactly what she needed right now. So she came. She heard a part of the Gospel. Through this, she began to question her Catholic faith and desired to know more about Christianity. We have hung out a few times since then and its been wonderful. I love sharing my faith with her. I love being able to be honest and real about what God has done and what He’s doing now. It’s such a blessing that God places people in my life and uses me to minister to them. I would have never thought in a million years, I would be sharing the Gospel with non-believers. So with that being said, stay tuned, cause God is at work! I’ll write more soon.

Very Truly Yours,

Liberty Stripped of Her Pride

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