Guard What Heart?

Okay girls, let’s talk about guarding our hearts. Before I lose you, hear me out on this. I, of all people, need to hear this and I hope it will be just as useful to you. I think we go through relationships thinking, that we are guarding our hearts, when we really have no idea how to. We don’t see the difference between telling ourselves we need to guard our hearts and actually guarding ourselves. If you are anything like me, you are not even sure of how long you are to guard your heart and to whom you are to guard it against. This blog post will not give you all of the answers, shooot, it might not help you at all; but it certainly gave me some thoughts to pray through. I only hope it does the same for you whether you are a female, male or a unicorn.

1. Not a 4.0 so far?

I hate to be the one to break it to you. But we have this heart to guard and we cannot get out of it. We are told it’s the very center of us. (Psalm 4:23) But how do we possibly guard it against the breeze we desperately open the window for? If you struggle with this the same way I do, you feel as though you are being graded with an “F” in guarding your heart these days. Whether you are single or in a relationship, you have to do it. You think (or rather convince yourself) no guy will ever be captivated by me and as soon as one nearly grins at you, you prepare a four course meal with the night’s special a-la-heart. How can we possibly help ourselves from giving our hearts so freely when we don’t even notice we are? I mean, we are girls (no offense).

2. All that advice you are given-What is a girl to do?

Between the, “Guard you heart, let him chase you, control your emotions, be patient, and he should pursue you” isms, you don’t even know what to do anymore. Between the silly advice your friend’s give, the little tid bits of wisdom you receive from ghosts of courtships past, and the will of God, you have a lot to decipher. We place so much emphasis on what others tell us. As soon as something big happens, we tell someone! I know for me, as soon as something comes up I run to text a friend about it, rather than praying. What’s so wrong about that? I don’t even give myself time to guard my heart and unfortunately, our friends are not always so helpful in that! The most important advice I have for you, pray! Even when you don’t feel like it, even when you don’t want to. Submit to God’s will. Place his desires above your own. Easier said than done, I know!

3. Finally, how do you really guard your heart?

To be entirely honest, I don’t want to guard my heart. I want to give it away. That is what I was made for. But I have it backwards, I was never meant to give my heart away to man (nor woman). I was created to give my heart to God. Wholly and always to Him. So if you feel the same way, how do you guard your heart when you want to, but have no desire to at the same time. You guard it with scripture. Do you spend more time thinking about the man of your dreams, or the man in your life, than you do thinking about the one who loved you first? Afterall, it says in Deuteronomy to love the Lord your God with all your heart. (Deuteronomy 6:5) It doesn’t say with a fourth of your heart or half heartedly.

I was in a Bible study a few weeks ago and we were talking about spiritual warfare. The verse Psalm 4:23 came up in our workbook which says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” I was struggling particularly that day, with guarding my heart and understanding how to guard it. Then it all suddenly made sense. Here we were talking about knowing scripture to stand against the enemy, when I realized scripture can be used for so much more. I have always loved the verse where the Psalmist says, “I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” (Psalm 119:11) When we know God’s word, do we not come to know God better? His heart for us has been written down and so often we don’t take the time to read it, me included! When I find myself so eagerly ready to give away my heart, I begin to remind myself of verses that I committed to memorization. When I do this, suddenly my mind is no longer on the things of this world, but focused on God.

He’s Always Enough,
Liberty

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Is He Enough?

When I look at certain things in my life, sometimes it feels like they are enough. I mean, when people tell me that I am wonderful, it makes me feel amazing. The career that I am planning for, its pretty exciting. I know I am going to love what I will do, that has got to be enough! Now you want to talk about boys? Well, that is simple, I will get married one day and we will live happily ever after. This stuff will make me happy, right?

Sometimes I try to convince myself they are enough. That they satisfy me and make me happy. There are days when I believe that I can keep living like all of those things will get me through this life. A life where children are starving and being beaten. A life where people go to bed hungry at night, in most parts of the world at least. I live in a world where women are seen as objects and are sold like antiques to be displayed. How can those things be enough when so many people in the world are without them?

Could He be enough for the broken and the oppressed? Could He be enough for me and for them? I think about the destiny we all have. Because we have fallen short of the glory of God through our sin, we deserve to be punished. We deserve hell. Grace, has been shown to us. I needed to be saved and Christ has stood in my place. God loves us and does not treat us as though we deserve his wrath any longer. Still not sure if he is enough?

God has sustained me time and time again. When my faith was weak, he showed me true faith. When my eyes were blind, he opened them and when my heart was dark, he brought light to it. When I thought I had no hope and that this world was too much for me to handle, He reminded me that He is my hope and the world is not too much for Him.

Could he possibly be better than anything I could dream up? Could he be better than rain? Could he be better than love? He never changes and promises to never leave me. Could he be better than guys? Perhaps better than receiving compliments and pleasing people? Could he be better than sunsets or gold? Or chocolate mousse? Could the sun be shining for him? Could he be the mastermind behind spring, summer, fall and winter? Could he hold me in his arms even when he feels far away? He has and he always will.

He is the blood that flows through my veins. The tears that fall down my face. He is the wind I feel through my hair. God is my everything. I was created to know him.

He’s Always Enough,
Liberty

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When Life’s Not Giving You Purpose (or Lemons)

I sit here and type this thinking, I have no motivation whatsoever. No motivation to attack my to do list, none to take a shower or to even write this post. I am at a time in my life when I feel as though I have no purpose. Have you ever been here? I’m not taking summer classes, neither am I working at all. I’m just preparing. In preparation for things to come. Don’t get me wrong, I have a massive to do list that encompasses everything from applying for on-campus housing to packing my room up in boxes, but not even these things sound the least bit interesting. So I sit here. No motivation. No purpose. What’s the point of life right now? I’m one of those people who needs a purpose. I refuse to strive for the laziest person award. (But that does not mean I don’t have my lazy moments.) I just need a passion. A routine. Some consistency. I need to feel useful. Life is not giving me any of these things right now. Not even the lemons. So what can I do when I get to this point? Give up, throw the towel in? Or wait patiently for this to pass? I’m certaintly on the fence with this one. But I’m learning more and more that my life is not defined by where I work or what classes I’m taking. If I’m looking for a passion in this world, I’m going to be looking for a long time because each one will eventually fade away. The only thing I can have faith in, is that God is good. Simply that. That He has good for me and what I have now is good. Now, I’m not quite getting to where I need to be and I know this won’t happen overnight. But I am learning to take one day at a time, because looking at the big picture, just isn’t helpful right now. All I can do is pray and go buy some lemons.

He’s ALWAYS Enough,
Liberty

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The Prayer of a Broken Heart

Dear Lord,

This sucks. I hate it all. Everything. Nothing seems to be going right. My whole world is falling a part. Where are you? Its so dark, I don’t know where to begin to look for you. Why are you allowing this to go on? Why must I suffer? It all changes with a blink of an eye, and you expect me to be okay with it? You expect me to go with the flow. To lean on you. To accept the change. You call me not to rely on my own strength. To believe that I am more than a conqueror through Him who first loved me? I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t know if I will make it. I’m not sure I have as much confidence in myself as you do. Everything is going wrong. My life is turning upside down. I’m angry. I’m broken. I’m confused. Yet, you say you will carry me through this. Yet, you say I don’t have to be weary. You tell me to not let go. You ask that I trust you and walk in faith. But is my faith big enough? Are you enough? Because I thought all of the things around me were enough. Now, those same things are deserting me. They’re changing. Unlike you. You never change. You never leave. You never forsake me. You don’t stop loving me. You never give up on me. You don’t reject me. You don’t say hurtful things to me. You don’t let me down. You want me to hold on. You want to love me. You want me to believe from the bottom of my heart that you are enough. You are on my side. You hold me when no one else will. You comfort me when no one else can. You give me the peace I can’t get anywhere else. You encourage me. You free my soul. You have saved me. You believe in me. You love me. You will never stop loving me. You are enough. You are all that I have. All that I have is enough. I can live with that. As long as you can live with me. I have no joy a part from you.

You are always enough,
Liberty Stripped of her Pride

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